Fortunately, we live in a world where everyday people with brilliant minds can create hilarious works of art by way of posting something — a video, a written blurb, a photo — via the good ol’ internet.
One such mind, someone from San Luis Obispo, California, created an ad on CraigsList titled: Failed hispter – fixie must go, and it goes like this:
I tried so hard. I dated a girl from Portland. I criticized cheese. I applied the term artisanal to every inanimate object that went in or on my body. I burned and singed my forearms just to make it look like I was going to culinary school. I grew Carol Brady hair. I got itchy from the finest flannel and I cut off circulation from the waist down with jeans that made my ass look like an elevator button.
… And I rode a fixie.